Dearest Friend

My dearest friend,

I am saddened and frustrated today that you are dying. You have been such a trustworthy friend and now our time together is fading fast. Your failing health and performance has drawn me to your side more times than I had wished, but even with your poor health we have been a good team. You have made me work harder than most and with a sad and relieved heart I know our friendship will not last much longer. Good bye my trusty old washing machine! You are dying and it is time for a new one!

I don't have enough time in the day to turn your dials again and again just to get through one cycle. I am tired of finding mysterious screws in the wash and can't seem to figure out where they are coming from. You are too loud and my ears just can't take listening to you and my children (someone must go and it isn't going to be the kids). Farewell, farewell, adieu! Love, Me